Thursday, October 1, 2009

Overwhelmed

So I've been having a really hard time lately. And recently I feel like I'm just going to have a meltdown, I'm so overwhelmed with so many things in my life. Although half of it is my own fault, it's still really tough and I'm not really sure what to do. So if anyone has suggestions, please share them.

This is my senior year, and I've decided to pile it all on. I'm taking 18 credits, still have my 2 jobs (which luckily only add up to 15-25 hours a week), and I've recently decided to take up the roles and responsibilities as ASCSU Senator for the College of Applied Human Sciences, as well as my role as part of the College of Applied Human Sciences Dean's Leadership Council. So those are the things I'm involved in, which is a lot, but that doesn't include my responsibilities in some of my classes. I'm also a TA and group facilitator for one of my classes which is a 3 hour class twice a week. Also for my group organizations and communities class I am in the process of setting up an Informational Discussion Panel on the Health Care Reform. I'm constantly in contact with the Congresswoman of Colorado 4th district, and 2 of the US House of Representatives for Colorado as they will be the educators and participants of this Discussion Panel. It's a lot of work for a project, but I enjoy it. I also am working on my Mock Trial Debate for my Social Welfare Policy class on HIV/AIDS. These projects, mind you, are aside from all of the homework and papers I have due.

So that is just my school life, outside of my school life I have church, I'm the Visiting Teacher District Supervisor aside from all of my own visiting teaching I do every month. I have institute classes with homework in them, and I go to FHE every Monday night and +1 meeting with the missionaries.

As you can see I'm very busy, and the reason why I've decided to pile all of this on is to fill a void in my life. I'm going through some emotional drama. I've been trying to get over Garrett for a while now and I've been doing everything I can think of to get over him. So I've figured that I could just be as busy as I possibly can to forget about him. It works sometimes, but there are a lot of time when I really miss him and I'm confused about what I'm going to do now.

I'm also going through a hard time with figuring out what my next step is in life. I don't like not knowing what I'm doing next or what plan I have. I really wanted to go to nursing school and I have been on the waiting list for a year now to get into Front Range; everything was all set up for me to attend the fall after I graduate CSU. But then I received a letter that pushed it back a whole year because they didn't realize they had so many applicants. So now I'm struggling with what the heck I'm supposed to do now. I could work for a while until I get into the nursing school at Front Range, I could look into other nursing schools (after all nothing is tying me down here anymore), or I could go on a mission.

So as you can see I'm kind of dealing with a lot right now, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to cope with everything, I'm not sure how to feel or what I'm supposed to do. Any suggestions with anything?

2 comments:

Patty Sampson said...

Wow, you poor girl. My first suggestion is to get a blessing. Your heart needs to be healed and only the Lord can really do that. Second, why are you killing yourself with school when you now have an extra year to spread things out over? Being a Student Senator is so fun, and a perfect way to dive into social life and forget you know who. I would recommend cutting back on class loads so you have time for the fun stuff, and can easily tell what you will be doing next year too. That is what I would do. I think you have already got a plan (nursing school) and it sounds like a good one. A mission is a great idea too. The blessing will help with all that. Good luck! I love you!! I am praying for you.

JustJon said...

If you create a new void in the process of filling another one, you haven't made any improvement. Make sure that you feel like you get VALUE out of everything you do, and don't just do it for the sake of being active or involved.